Found here originally.
There you are sitting in worship or Bible study. Your child, or toddler, is restless. Perhaps they’re even a little boisterous. You try to silence them, and nothing. You try to pacify them with food or toys, and nothing. Eventually, you resort to the last thing you wanted to do: you pick them up, and before a watching audience, you make the march out of the auditorium. All the while, you’re a little embarrassed. Maybe you’re a little frustrated too. You might even think to yourself, “There’s no point in coming to church. I get nothing out of it because I have to constantly care for my kid.”
I want you — you mothers and/or fathers — to know just how encouraging you are to so many. The little elderly woman who often fills alone beams with a smile at the sight of you wrestling with your little one. She’s been there before. She knows how hard it can be, but she smiles because to hear that brings back precious memories. To see young parents and their small children brighten her day, and she may have just received bad news this week about her health, but seeing the vitality of young ones removes — if but for a moment — her fears.
The older man who always seems to be grouchy notices you too. He’s always talking about how children in this day have no respect or sense of good. But, he sees you — a young family — in church, and you don’t miss any gathering. Like clockwork, he can depend on the sight of you and your young family. You give him hope that maybe the church isn’t doomed after all, because there are still young parents who love God enough to bring their restless children to worship.
Then there’s everybody else. Some people will honestly become frustrated by noisy children in church. They have this warped idea that reverence includes absolute silence. It doesn’t. When parents brought their children to Jesus, the disciples rebuked them (Matt. 19.13-15), but Jesus rebuked His disciples. He said, “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.” The term translated “children” in Matthew and Mark is paidon. The root of the word “pedagogue” is from this word. It defined children of either an infant state, or more particularly, it was with reference to those who were half-grown and could be either males or females.
When Luke wrote his account of this narrative, he used the word brephos; which means “infants.” Luke wasn’t contradicting Matthew and Mark’s account, because Luke wrote that they brought the infants “also” (Luke 18.15-17). They would have squirmed, maybe even cried. This was likely why the disciples rebuked the parents; as well as that they might have thought that the children were too young to understand the blessing Christ pronounced over them.
Bring your children to church. If you don’t hear crying, the church is dying. As hard as it might be for you as a parent who’s half-asleep, keep on doing what you’re doing. You are an encouragement, and you’re starting off your children’s lives as you should.
Monday, December 02, 2013
Sunday, November 17, 2013
Saturday, August 17, 2013
Family Camping - Lessons Learned
The past 48ish hours my family had a quick getaway to do some family camping. Well, one night in a hotel, one night camping. We spent Thursday night in Rochester in a hotel downtown because with work obligations I wasn't able to get home early, so we didn't leave town until after 8:30PM and there was no way we were driving 90 miles and then setting up a tent. So I hit priceline.com and found a reasonable room for the night that got us 70% of the way to our destination.
We camped at Whitewater State Park, just North of St. Charles, MN and about 25 miles East of Rochester on Hwy. 14. We had lucked out in that there was a single campsite still available for Friday evening earlier this week, so we took it. It was the ideal weekend to be there in that there was a bunch of young child specific programming scheduled in the park. So we lucked into that.
Among the lessons I've learned the last 48 hours:
1) A quiet relaxing walk in the woods with a 4 year old is neither quiet nor relaxing. (but still enjoyable)
2) I'm too old to sleep on the ground.
3) We need a bigger car.
4) The best malts ever are at Del's Cafe in downtown St. Charles. In fact, all the food there that we tried was fantastic, but the malt was simply over the top.
5) The gas pumps at the St. Charles Cenex don't shut off when your tank is full like everywhere else in the world does, thereby you'll soak yourself in gas if you are filling it and standing next to the handle when it hits full and keeps going.
6) Even in mid-August the Whitewater River is REALLY cold.
7) I still like camping, though I still don't like car camping in sites piled on top of each other.
8) I love my Chaco sandals. But I had a minor blowout that looks like I'll be having to send them in for a bit of warranty work. Probably one of the best companies on the planet for this kind of thing, so I trust I'll be treated well.
9) Doesn't matter what cool places you go, the gravel parking pad at the campsite is still one of the best places on the planet to play with toys.
10) The best way to end a campout is Outback Steakhouse on the way home. Why we didn't do this as Boy Scouts...
We had a great time getting away. No cell phone coverage, no electricity, no computers. Just fun and family. Hadn't set our tent up in longer than I care to admit, but it went up with no problems. We opened our time at camp with a puppet show put on by one of the camp rangers over near the beach area. We ran into town for lunch at Del's Cafe and then grabbed some non-perishable/no cooking required foods at the local grocery store and headed back to camp.
When we got back to camp we decided to hike up to Chimney Rock, and did that full loop in the midday heat (not advisable in the heat honestly, wait until it cools). Nice views, though like spending an hour on the Stairmaster, so be warned that it basically straight up the hill, across the ridge a short distance and then right back down the hill with no flat spots in between. I hiked it in my Chaco sandals (Vibram soles) but I don't recommend that. It is wickedly rocky and root strewn in places, so toe protection is advised.
We spent the rest of the sunlit part of the afternoon/evening at the beach just relaxing and enjoying some truly amazing weather. We made it back to camp as the sun was setting and while my other two family members took care of some odds & ends at the shower house, I got the campfire setup and burning. Whitewater doesn't allow outside firewood, so buy it for $5 a bundle at the visitor's center (not cheap). At least the wood is all hardwood and pre-split though. Sat around the campfire trying to see meteorites falling with very little success. Eventually the little man was too tired and he dragged my wife off to the tent to sleep. She was going to study, but within about 5 minutes they were both out. I stayed up and tended the fire until it was out and then went to bed myself.
I ended up with the most uncomfortable sleeping spot ever. There was a high point right were my hips rest, and my head and feet were lower, and the ground slanted into the side of the tent besides that. I guess that's what I get for being the last in the tent. So the night's sleep was pretty miserable, though our 4 year old had one of his best night's sleep ever. But my wife & I agree, we're too old to sleep on the ground. Cots or an air mattress next time.
Got up this morning and let the wife head to town to the coffee shop to do some studying. She speaks very highly of the St. Charles coffee shop. I don't drink coffee, so I'll leave that up to her to define. Little man and I had some good play time and I packed up most of the sleeping gear so we'd be ready later in the day to head home. Then at 10:00am we went of and did some more programming that the park had set up for younger children. Watched birds, hiked some more, looked at flowers, stuck our feet in the river, read books, and more I'm sure I'm forgetting. All in all a great day.
This was our son's first time camping. He had asked if we could go about a week ago, and I'm pretty sure he now wants to go again, which I suppose is a good thing. At least it will be if I can find a battery powered air mattress.
We camped at Whitewater State Park, just North of St. Charles, MN and about 25 miles East of Rochester on Hwy. 14. We had lucked out in that there was a single campsite still available for Friday evening earlier this week, so we took it. It was the ideal weekend to be there in that there was a bunch of young child specific programming scheduled in the park. So we lucked into that.
Among the lessons I've learned the last 48 hours:
1) A quiet relaxing walk in the woods with a 4 year old is neither quiet nor relaxing. (but still enjoyable)
2) I'm too old to sleep on the ground.
3) We need a bigger car.
4) The best malts ever are at Del's Cafe in downtown St. Charles. In fact, all the food there that we tried was fantastic, but the malt was simply over the top.
5) The gas pumps at the St. Charles Cenex don't shut off when your tank is full like everywhere else in the world does, thereby you'll soak yourself in gas if you are filling it and standing next to the handle when it hits full and keeps going.
6) Even in mid-August the Whitewater River is REALLY cold.
7) I still like camping, though I still don't like car camping in sites piled on top of each other.
8) I love my Chaco sandals. But I had a minor blowout that looks like I'll be having to send them in for a bit of warranty work. Probably one of the best companies on the planet for this kind of thing, so I trust I'll be treated well.
9) Doesn't matter what cool places you go, the gravel parking pad at the campsite is still one of the best places on the planet to play with toys.
10) The best way to end a campout is Outback Steakhouse on the way home. Why we didn't do this as Boy Scouts...
We had a great time getting away. No cell phone coverage, no electricity, no computers. Just fun and family. Hadn't set our tent up in longer than I care to admit, but it went up with no problems. We opened our time at camp with a puppet show put on by one of the camp rangers over near the beach area. We ran into town for lunch at Del's Cafe and then grabbed some non-perishable/no cooking required foods at the local grocery store and headed back to camp.
When we got back to camp we decided to hike up to Chimney Rock, and did that full loop in the midday heat (not advisable in the heat honestly, wait until it cools). Nice views, though like spending an hour on the Stairmaster, so be warned that it basically straight up the hill, across the ridge a short distance and then right back down the hill with no flat spots in between. I hiked it in my Chaco sandals (Vibram soles) but I don't recommend that. It is wickedly rocky and root strewn in places, so toe protection is advised.
We spent the rest of the sunlit part of the afternoon/evening at the beach just relaxing and enjoying some truly amazing weather. We made it back to camp as the sun was setting and while my other two family members took care of some odds & ends at the shower house, I got the campfire setup and burning. Whitewater doesn't allow outside firewood, so buy it for $5 a bundle at the visitor's center (not cheap). At least the wood is all hardwood and pre-split though. Sat around the campfire trying to see meteorites falling with very little success. Eventually the little man was too tired and he dragged my wife off to the tent to sleep. She was going to study, but within about 5 minutes they were both out. I stayed up and tended the fire until it was out and then went to bed myself.
I ended up with the most uncomfortable sleeping spot ever. There was a high point right were my hips rest, and my head and feet were lower, and the ground slanted into the side of the tent besides that. I guess that's what I get for being the last in the tent. So the night's sleep was pretty miserable, though our 4 year old had one of his best night's sleep ever. But my wife & I agree, we're too old to sleep on the ground. Cots or an air mattress next time.
Got up this morning and let the wife head to town to the coffee shop to do some studying. She speaks very highly of the St. Charles coffee shop. I don't drink coffee, so I'll leave that up to her to define. Little man and I had some good play time and I packed up most of the sleeping gear so we'd be ready later in the day to head home. Then at 10:00am we went of and did some more programming that the park had set up for younger children. Watched birds, hiked some more, looked at flowers, stuck our feet in the river, read books, and more I'm sure I'm forgetting. All in all a great day.
This was our son's first time camping. He had asked if we could go about a week ago, and I'm pretty sure he now wants to go again, which I suppose is a good thing. At least it will be if I can find a battery powered air mattress.
Tuesday, August 13, 2013
HOW TO TELL A KID THEIR MOM IS DEAD - by Rob Brink
My friend Rob wrote the following and I'd encourage you to interact with it on his blog. I'm copying it here so I have a permanent record of it as well. This comes from a recent real ministry experience of his, so it isn't some abstract philosophy. Great stuff.
HOW TO TELL A KID THEIR MOM IS DEAD
by Rob Brink
“I have two kids in the house who don’t know their mom is dead. What do I tell them?”
We can all hope we will never have to deliver this news, especially to a young child. But failing to prepare for a horrible thing doesn’t make it easier. And accepting reality doesn’t make it worse. So, in case you ever have to break the news, here is one pastor’s guidance for doing a hard thing well.
Guidelines:
“I have two kids in the house who don’t know their mom is dead. What do I tell them?”
We can all hope we will never have to deliver this news, especially to a young child. But failing to prepare for a horrible thing doesn’t make it easier. And accepting reality doesn’t make it worse. So, in case you ever have to break the news, here is one pastor’s guidance for doing a hard thing well.
Guidelines:
- Don’t lie. Don’t soften it. Don’t sugar-coat it. Tell the truth. Speak in simple, declarative sentences.
- Don’t use metaphors. Young minds don’t handle metaphors well. Most of us develop that skill sometime in High School. Speak in simple, clear sentences.
- Don’t try to “be strong” for their sake. Your tears validate their tears. Your emotions show them that they are right. It really is horrible, it really is real, and they are not alone.
- If they ask a question, the best answer is usually, “What do you think?” If you give them an answer first, they feel pressure to agree with your “right” answer. But if they speak first and then you respond, they have a chance to pick which answer works for them. If they don’t pick yours, maybe they’re not ready for it and they will be later. If they do switch to your answer, you just gave them a gift that helped them cope.
- Let them cope in their own way. Maybe they need to cry. Maybe they need to play. Maybe they need to sleep. Whatever they choose, it likely brings them comfort or control. Unless they are hurting themselves or someone else, let them grieve how they grieve.
- If possible, give them the best chance to hear this well. Don’t wake them up in the middle of the night. Don’t talk to them when you are inconsolable and out of control.
- Give them as much of a support network as you can. Friends and family, especially their own age, can help them grieve, and they spread the load so it doesn’t all fall on you.
- As horrible as this is for you, it is worse for them. Accept their grief, and find someone else to accept yours.
- Warn them the bad news is coming.
- Introduce the news progressively, not abruptly.
- Tell them.
- Love on them.
- Guys, I have some bad news.
- *Pause*
- I have some horrible, sad news.
- *Pause*
- There was an accident.
- Your mom was in a car accident.
- It was a bad accident and she got hurt.
- People tried their best to help her.
- The injuries were too much.
- She died.
- *Stop talking.*
- *They will probably break down. Love on them. Cry with them.*
- *Keep living.*
Monday, June 10, 2013
Bacon Carnitas Chimichanga
I think I invented an amazing new food yesterday. The Bacon Carnitas Chimicanga.
Wow.
It is better than you just imagined. Take all the awesomeness of bacon - crispy and smoky and salty, chop it up, and mix it in with the delightful richness of Carnitas. As some shredded Mexican cheese(s), wrap, fry, throw some red sauce or white cheese sauce on it and a bit more shredded cheese to garnish, and serve with Mexican rice and refried beans.
The crunch of the shell, the softness of the Carnitas and the toothiness of the bacon come together perfectly in your mouth.
And the flavors - it is a dance party in your mouth and on your tongue!
Sunday, June 09, 2013
Thursday, June 06, 2013
Tuesday, June 04, 2013
"Greater" - by Steven Furtick
I had read Furtick's "Sun Stand Still" previously, so entered with a bit of expectation for this book as that one was a decent read. This one was not Greater. It seem to wonder constantly, was unfocused, and really never made a clear point. It was as though (presumably) the sermons he wrote originally that later were condensed for this book had no clear goals to begin with, leaving the final product muddy.
There are times in this book where Furtick moves uncomfortably close (for me anyhow) to promoting a prosperity theology - just short of name it claim it kind of thinking. Then in other places it seems like he wants to steal from David Platt and have everyone suffering nearly unecessarily for their faith (less of this than the prosperity though).
There are a few quotable thoughts scattered here and there, but none of them worth mining through the rest of this so that you can find them. While it isn't the worst book I've read, I'd certainly steer clear of this and find yourself something better to grow your faith. When I got more out of reading the endorsements of the book than I did from the book itself, it should tell you something.
I was given a review copy of this book by Blogging for Books, but as is obvious, was in no way obligated to write a favorable review.
Sunday, April 21, 2013
Benson Henderson - UFC - Walkout Song on 4/20/13
Tonight Benson Henderson walked out to R-Swift's adaptation of Rich Mullins' Awesome God.
Bendo was rocking it and singing to it as he walked out. Love it!
Bendo was rocking it and singing to it as he walked out. Love it!
Friday, April 12, 2013
Thursday, April 04, 2013
Sunday, March 10, 2013
Philmont - A Ranger's Summer movie
I have spent over a calendar year of my life in the mountains featured in this video. The Sangre de Christo Range. Philmont Scout Ranch, Cimarron, NM. If you've been there, you'll find your pulse racing as you watch this video. It will stir the longing to go back. IWGBTP!
Thursday, February 28, 2013
Monday, February 25, 2013
Ten Things I Want to Tell Teenage Girls - by Kate Conner
Exceptional post by Kate Conner.
2. Don’t go to the tanning bed. You’ll thank me when you go to your high school reunion and you look like you’ve been airbrushed and then photoshopped compared to the tanning bed train wrecks formerly known as classmates – well, at least next to the ones that haven’t died from skin cancer.
3. When you talk about your friends “anonymously” on Facebook, we know exactly who you’re talking about. People are smarter than you think they are. Stop posting passive-aggressive statuses about the myriad of ways your friends disappoint you.
4. Newsflash: the number of times you say “I hate drama” is a pretty good indicator of how much you love drama. Non-dramatic people don’t feel the need to discuss all the drama they didn’t start and aren’t involved in.
5. “Follow your heart” is probably the worst advice ever.
6. Never let a man make you feel weak or inferior because you are an emotional being. Emotion is good; it is nothing to be ashamed of. Emotion makes us better – so long as it remains in it’s proper place: subject to truth and reason.
7. Smoking is not cool.
8. Stop saying things like, “I don’t care what anyone thinks about me.” First of all, that’s not true. And second of all, if it is true, you need a perspective shift. Your reputation matters – greatly. You should care what people think of you.
9. Don’t play coy or stupid or helpless to get attention. Don’t pretend something is too heavy so that a boy will carry it for you. Don’t play dumb to stroke someone’s ego. Don’t bat your eyelashes in exchange for attention and expect to be taken seriously, ever. You can’t have it both ways. Either you show the world that you have a brain and passions and skills, or you don’t. There are no damsels in distress managing corporations, running countries, or managing households. The minute you start batting eyelashes, eyelashes is all you’ve got.
10. You are beautiful. You are enough. The world we live in is twisted and broken and for your entire life you will be subjected to all kinds of lies that tell you that you are not enough. You are not thin enough. You are not tan enough. You are not smooth, soft, shiny, firm, tight, fit, silky, blonde, hairless enough. Your teeth are not white enough. Your legs are not long enough. Your clothes are not stylish enough. You are not educated enough. You don’t have enough experience. You are not creative enough.
There is a beauty industry, a fashion industry, a television industry, (and most unfortunately) a pornography industry: and all of these have unique ways of communicating to bright young women: you are not beautiful, sexy, smart or valuable enough.
You must have the clarity and common sense to know that none of that is true. None of it.
You were created for a purpose, exactly so. You have innate value. You are loved more than you could ever comprehend; it is mind-boggling how much you are adored. There has never been, and there will never be another you. Therefore, you have unique thoughts to offer the world. They are only yours, and we all lose out if you are too fearful to share them.
You are beautiful. You are valuable. You are enough.
(Read “Ten Things I Want to Tell Teenage Boys” here.) (Read last year’s “Ten Things I Want To Tell New Moms” here.)
Ten Things I Want To Tell Teenage Girls
1. If you choose to wear shirts that show off your boobs, you will attract boys. To be more specific, you will attract the kind of boys that like to look down girls’ shirts. If you want to date a guy who likes to look at other girls’ boobs and chase skirts, then great job; keep it up. If you don’t want to date a guy who ogles at the breasts of other women, then maybe you should stop offering your own breasts up for the ogling. All attention is not equal. You think you want attention, but you don’t. You want respect. All attention is not equal.2. Don’t go to the tanning bed. You’ll thank me when you go to your high school reunion and you look like you’ve been airbrushed and then photoshopped compared to the tanning bed train wrecks formerly known as classmates – well, at least next to the ones that haven’t died from skin cancer.
3. When you talk about your friends “anonymously” on Facebook, we know exactly who you’re talking about. People are smarter than you think they are. Stop posting passive-aggressive statuses about the myriad of ways your friends disappoint you.
4. Newsflash: the number of times you say “I hate drama” is a pretty good indicator of how much you love drama. Non-dramatic people don’t feel the need to discuss all the drama they didn’t start and aren’t involved in.
5. “Follow your heart” is probably the worst advice ever.
6. Never let a man make you feel weak or inferior because you are an emotional being. Emotion is good; it is nothing to be ashamed of. Emotion makes us better – so long as it remains in it’s proper place: subject to truth and reason.
7. Smoking is not cool.
8. Stop saying things like, “I don’t care what anyone thinks about me.” First of all, that’s not true. And second of all, if it is true, you need a perspective shift. Your reputation matters – greatly. You should care what people think of you.
9. Don’t play coy or stupid or helpless to get attention. Don’t pretend something is too heavy so that a boy will carry it for you. Don’t play dumb to stroke someone’s ego. Don’t bat your eyelashes in exchange for attention and expect to be taken seriously, ever. You can’t have it both ways. Either you show the world that you have a brain and passions and skills, or you don’t. There are no damsels in distress managing corporations, running countries, or managing households. The minute you start batting eyelashes, eyelashes is all you’ve got.
10. You are beautiful. You are enough. The world we live in is twisted and broken and for your entire life you will be subjected to all kinds of lies that tell you that you are not enough. You are not thin enough. You are not tan enough. You are not smooth, soft, shiny, firm, tight, fit, silky, blonde, hairless enough. Your teeth are not white enough. Your legs are not long enough. Your clothes are not stylish enough. You are not educated enough. You don’t have enough experience. You are not creative enough.
There is a beauty industry, a fashion industry, a television industry, (and most unfortunately) a pornography industry: and all of these have unique ways of communicating to bright young women: you are not beautiful, sexy, smart or valuable enough.
You must have the clarity and common sense to know that none of that is true. None of it.
You were created for a purpose, exactly so. You have innate value. You are loved more than you could ever comprehend; it is mind-boggling how much you are adored. There has never been, and there will never be another you. Therefore, you have unique thoughts to offer the world. They are only yours, and we all lose out if you are too fearful to share them.
You are beautiful. You are valuable. You are enough.
(Read “Ten Things I Want to Tell Teenage Boys” here.) (Read last year’s “Ten Things I Want To Tell New Moms” here.)
Saturday, February 23, 2013
Thursday, February 21, 2013
10 Hard Questions - Tim Stevens
Some really good stuff below from Tim Stevens.
Our honest answer? No. Many years ago, a report was released indicating that 50 percent of our county did not attend church. A recent report indicates the number is now 60 percent. We hadn’t even kept up with the population growth or net loss from the decline of other churches.
Yes, we were having an impact on individuals, and thousands of lives had been changed. But we weren’t making a dent in actually changing a growing percentage of our community into mission-minded followers of Jesus.
The Shrinking 40 Percent
We weren’t alone. Every current poll I’ve seen indicates the American church is in decline. Yes, the number of large churches is increasing, but overall church attendance continues to go down. The way we do church—the model of Christendom that has been followed for the past 1,700 years—is working with fewer people all the time. Most people reading this are the product of the type of church that is, as a whole, becoming less and less effective.
Just about every church in America can be described by three words: “Come to us.” That is it. We put on amazing services and do everything we can to communicate truth to the people who make the effort to come to “the box” for worship. Some boxes are beautiful, and others are utilitarian. Some boxes are ornate with stained glass and a pipe organ, and others are located in an empty Walmart. But most of what we do is at, through and around “the box.” Many times even the mercy and justice ministries we engage in outside the walls are done for the primary purpose of inviting people to “come to the box.”
I remember being at a leadership conference where Alan Hirsch was teaching through the main thesis of his watershed book, The Forgotten Ways. We had opportunity to ask questions, push back and consider the practical application for our churches. Alan said he believed that this “come to us” model of church still works for around 40 percent of our population. Does that mean 40 percent attend? Not at all. But there is probably around 40 percent of the population for whom the model still works. We can put on great weekend services, and 40 percent of the people in our community are still attracted to, or at least not repelled by, that model.
Is that a scientific number? No. Is there any research to back up that number? No. But I believe it to my core. We have asked scores of people in our church whether they think it is accurate. To make it easy to consider, we put it this way: “If you were to invite 10 people to come to church with you, how many of them do you think would consider your invitation?” Over and over, they agree that it is probably no more than four people.
Maybe the number is much lower in the Northeast or Northwest. Maybe it’s much higher in the Bible Belt states. But every pastor I have talked to agrees that the number, whatever it is, is shrinking. Whatever you decide the number is for your community, it is likely getting smaller every year.
I remember a LifeWay Research survey, which found that “… a growing number of Americans are recognizing a need to develop their inner life … but many don’t know where to begin, especially if they don’t consider themselves ‘religious.’ Even if they are religious, many haven’t found everything they’re seeking in weekly services.” The article went on to report that 86 percent said they could have a “good relationship with God without belonging to a church.” I used that quote scores of times in talks I gave around the country in 2008 and early 2009. But, I don’t think the impact of that trend hit me hard until I was sitting with Rob [Wegner] listening to Alan talk at that conference. It was the first time I really considered the impact of the shrinking 40 percent.
The Growing 60 Percent
Everyone who is not in the shrinking 40 percent is part of the growing 60 percent. These are people who might believe in God (whatever that means for them), have a respect for Jesus and are on a spiritual journey, but they don’t consider the church (as we know it) as a resource to help them take steps. And it is likely they never will. They pursue their spirituality through culture, friendships, music, TV personalities, their own study of the Bible, self-help books and more. A study by the Pew Forum on Religion & Public Life conducted in early 2010 reports, “… more than a quarter of Americans born after 1981 have no religious preference or affiliation. Fewer than one in five teens and 20-somethings frequent worship services” But the study also revealed that young adults pray as often as their elders did at that age and share an equally strong faith in God. More and more young adults are pursuing their faith outside of the church.
We can argue the percentage. You may not believe it is as high as 60 percent. But whatever the number, it is growing.
As our Granger leadership faced the truth that we weren’t making any real impact in the 60 percent of the population around us, it seemed we had a choice to make:
[Note: Tim Stevens continues the story behind the story of how Granger has championed both attractional and missional, and the impact of the both/and combination in the 2012 release Vision: Lost and Found available for purchase here.]
10 Hard Questions Every Leader Should Be Asking
Every church leader serious about making disciples should be asking themselves the same hard questions Granger leadership asked:
1. Is the sheer number of “unchurched” people in our area any less than it was before we existed?
2. Is the way we do church more effective or less effective in reaching people and making true disciples since we began?
3. Is most of what we do at, through and around “the box”?
4. (survey your congregation): “If you were to invite 10 people to come to church with you, how many of them do you think would consider your invitation?”
5. Am I as a leader content with reaching just the 40 percent that will still consider a “come to us” approach? Is our church?
6. Do I want to reach the growing 60 percent that won’t respond to “come and see” ministry? Does our church?
7. If so, is our church equipped and ready to reach the 60 percent?
8. What should I as a leader do next?
9. What steps should we as a church take?
10. Am I as a leader praying, “God, open my eyes”? Am I leading our church in the same prayer?
10 Hard Questions Every Planter Needs to Ask
Granger Community Church recently celebrated our 25th year (in December 2011). For a quarter of a century now, we’ve been a mission outpost in our community. We’ve seen thousands of people come to Jesus, get baptized and begin new, changed lives. The impact has been undeniable. And yet in February 2010, we looked at each other and asked a hard question: Is the sheer number of “unchurched” people in our area any less than it was 25 years ago before Granger existed?Our honest answer? No. Many years ago, a report was released indicating that 50 percent of our county did not attend church. A recent report indicates the number is now 60 percent. We hadn’t even kept up with the population growth or net loss from the decline of other churches.
Yes, we were having an impact on individuals, and thousands of lives had been changed. But we weren’t making a dent in actually changing a growing percentage of our community into mission-minded followers of Jesus.
The Shrinking 40 Percent
We weren’t alone. Every current poll I’ve seen indicates the American church is in decline. Yes, the number of large churches is increasing, but overall church attendance continues to go down. The way we do church—the model of Christendom that has been followed for the past 1,700 years—is working with fewer people all the time. Most people reading this are the product of the type of church that is, as a whole, becoming less and less effective.
Just about every church in America can be described by three words: “Come to us.” That is it. We put on amazing services and do everything we can to communicate truth to the people who make the effort to come to “the box” for worship. Some boxes are beautiful, and others are utilitarian. Some boxes are ornate with stained glass and a pipe organ, and others are located in an empty Walmart. But most of what we do is at, through and around “the box.” Many times even the mercy and justice ministries we engage in outside the walls are done for the primary purpose of inviting people to “come to the box.”
I remember being at a leadership conference where Alan Hirsch was teaching through the main thesis of his watershed book, The Forgotten Ways. We had opportunity to ask questions, push back and consider the practical application for our churches. Alan said he believed that this “come to us” model of church still works for around 40 percent of our population. Does that mean 40 percent attend? Not at all. But there is probably around 40 percent of the population for whom the model still works. We can put on great weekend services, and 40 percent of the people in our community are still attracted to, or at least not repelled by, that model.
Is that a scientific number? No. Is there any research to back up that number? No. But I believe it to my core. We have asked scores of people in our church whether they think it is accurate. To make it easy to consider, we put it this way: “If you were to invite 10 people to come to church with you, how many of them do you think would consider your invitation?” Over and over, they agree that it is probably no more than four people.
Maybe the number is much lower in the Northeast or Northwest. Maybe it’s much higher in the Bible Belt states. But every pastor I have talked to agrees that the number, whatever it is, is shrinking. Whatever you decide the number is for your community, it is likely getting smaller every year.
I remember a LifeWay Research survey, which found that “… a growing number of Americans are recognizing a need to develop their inner life … but many don’t know where to begin, especially if they don’t consider themselves ‘religious.’ Even if they are religious, many haven’t found everything they’re seeking in weekly services.” The article went on to report that 86 percent said they could have a “good relationship with God without belonging to a church.” I used that quote scores of times in talks I gave around the country in 2008 and early 2009. But, I don’t think the impact of that trend hit me hard until I was sitting with Rob [Wegner] listening to Alan talk at that conference. It was the first time I really considered the impact of the shrinking 40 percent.
The Growing 60 Percent
Everyone who is not in the shrinking 40 percent is part of the growing 60 percent. These are people who might believe in God (whatever that means for them), have a respect for Jesus and are on a spiritual journey, but they don’t consider the church (as we know it) as a resource to help them take steps. And it is likely they never will. They pursue their spirituality through culture, friendships, music, TV personalities, their own study of the Bible, self-help books and more. A study by the Pew Forum on Religion & Public Life conducted in early 2010 reports, “… more than a quarter of Americans born after 1981 have no religious preference or affiliation. Fewer than one in five teens and 20-somethings frequent worship services” But the study also revealed that young adults pray as often as their elders did at that age and share an equally strong faith in God. More and more young adults are pursuing their faith outside of the church.
We can argue the percentage. You may not believe it is as high as 60 percent. But whatever the number, it is growing.
As our Granger leadership faced the truth that we weren’t making any real impact in the 60 percent of the population around us, it seemed we had a choice to make:
- We could continue to pour our lives and efforts and largest share of our ministry focus and dollars into reaching the 40 percent. Nothing wrong with that. Pure statistics show there are 62,000 people within five miles of one of our campuses who don’t go to church and who are part of the 40 percent. That’s a bunch of people who very well might be open to exploring their spirituality with us in a service. So on a relational level, we could continue to encourage our people to do everything they could to build relationships with a friend and start spiritual conversations, hoping to lead them toward a chance when they can invite them to a service where they will hear how much they matter to God? That was certainly an option. We could probably do “successful” ministry for years with this group. But eventually, the statistical reality would catch up. And we’d be spending more money and time with decreasing effectiveness.
- Another viable option: Leave the institutional church. Forget the “come and see,” attractional approach. It’s reaching a smaller and smaller percentage every year, right? It’s a dying breed. So why spend any more time there? Let’s be missional. Let’s go to the masses. If the 60/40 hypothesis is true, then let’s go to the more than 93,000 within five miles of our physical sites who don’t go to church and who likely will never go to church as we know it. These are people who are taking spiritual steps but need help. They are people who need to know how much they matter to God and how much they matter to the church. So we would be encouraging people to be the love of Jesus right where people live, in a culture they know best where God has given them influence, and be the church with them, right there, where they live.
[Note: Tim Stevens continues the story behind the story of how Granger has championed both attractional and missional, and the impact of the both/and combination in the 2012 release Vision: Lost and Found available for purchase here.]
10 Hard Questions Every Leader Should Be Asking
Every church leader serious about making disciples should be asking themselves the same hard questions Granger leadership asked:
1. Is the sheer number of “unchurched” people in our area any less than it was before we existed?
2. Is the way we do church more effective or less effective in reaching people and making true disciples since we began?
3. Is most of what we do at, through and around “the box”?
4. (survey your congregation): “If you were to invite 10 people to come to church with you, how many of them do you think would consider your invitation?”
5. Am I as a leader content with reaching just the 40 percent that will still consider a “come to us” approach? Is our church?
6. Do I want to reach the growing 60 percent that won’t respond to “come and see” ministry? Does our church?
7. If so, is our church equipped and ready to reach the 60 percent?
8. What should I as a leader do next?
9. What steps should we as a church take?
10. Am I as a leader praying, “God, open my eyes”? Am I leading our church in the same prayer?
What is Love?
Below is a short but powerful video on love.
What Is Love? from cvcnow on Vimeo.
Do marriage vows seem to mean as much today as they used to? If you've heard anything about the increase in divorce rates, you may wonder.
Bill & Glad are ignoring the trends. More than ever the vows they made 50 years ago are being tested. In sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, the promise they are keeping is a true example of what love is.
What Is Love? from cvcnow on Vimeo.
Do marriage vows seem to mean as much today as they used to? If you've heard anything about the increase in divorce rates, you may wonder.
Bill & Glad are ignoring the trends. More than ever the vows they made 50 years ago are being tested. In sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, the promise they are keeping is a true example of what love is.
Friday, February 15, 2013
What women really think about your facial hair?
I (obviously) don't endorse the following video as a guide in my life. But it is funny!
Wednesday, February 13, 2013
Lecrae raps the Gospel
Lecrae is the real deal. Incredibly gifted rapper with the best part being his Gospel focus!
Lecrae Raps the Gospel in One Minute from Desiring God on Vimeo.
http://www.desiringGod.org
Lecrae Raps the Gospel in One Minute from Desiring God on Vimeo.
http://www.desiringGod.org
Monday, February 11, 2013
Jack White on Love Interruption and Freedom at the Grammys
Jack White was the highlight of the Grammys last night in my opinion.
First song is "Love Interrupted" with
his all girl band. The Second one is "Freedom at 21" with his all guy band. And I want to know where Jack got that black with blue "peacock" jacket!?!?
Thursday, January 24, 2013
5 issues that can keep a church from growing
This comes from Dave Kraft.
Here Are 5 Issues That Can Keep A Church From Growing:
ENTITLEMENT – When the body begins to think “this is my church”, it will soon start operating outside the complete power and utter dependency of the rightful owner. It will then lose the Spirit’s power.
ENERGY – The lack of energy stagnates a church. This is not referring to worship. You can worship to your taste, but energy is a part of any movement of God. The church is the body of Christ. Don’t forget…our God is not dead…He’s alive! A church is revived and reenergized when it renews its vision. As a church grows closer to Christ, and introduces others to Christ, it creates more energy for the body.
EXCITEMENT – If you can’t get excited about the Gospel, you’re not looking at Christ close enough. Anyone who can raise from the dead, forgive sins, and reconcile us to God…that’s exciting! When the people who regularly attend the church aren’t excited anymore, visitors aren’t likely to be either. When a body becomes comfortable, it often becomes complacent, and it loses the excitement it once had. It is then no longer attractive to outsiders.
ENGAGEMENT – The body needs all its members. When a few people do all the work burnout is soon to follow. The church shouldn’t depend on paid staff to do all the work, nor should ministry be limited to those with a volunteer title of some sort. If assignments have to be made before people are freed to do the work of the church, over time, the harvest is plenty, but the workers are few.
EFFICIENCY – When programs are so structured that even God couldn’t introduce change, decline is imminent. Growing churches are always thinking how they can improve. The cliche is true, the message never changes, but the hearers do. Finding new ways to reach a changing culture with a Gospel that never changes is part of a growing church’s responsibility.
Obviously there are many other reasons; these are just a few I’ve observed. Whenever I work with a church in decline, I will first look for one of these areas as a solution.
+What have you seen keep a church from growing?
Here Are 5 Issues That Can Keep A Church From Growing:
ENTITLEMENT – When the body begins to think “this is my church”, it will soon start operating outside the complete power and utter dependency of the rightful owner. It will then lose the Spirit’s power.
ENERGY – The lack of energy stagnates a church. This is not referring to worship. You can worship to your taste, but energy is a part of any movement of God. The church is the body of Christ. Don’t forget…our God is not dead…He’s alive! A church is revived and reenergized when it renews its vision. As a church grows closer to Christ, and introduces others to Christ, it creates more energy for the body.
EXCITEMENT – If you can’t get excited about the Gospel, you’re not looking at Christ close enough. Anyone who can raise from the dead, forgive sins, and reconcile us to God…that’s exciting! When the people who regularly attend the church aren’t excited anymore, visitors aren’t likely to be either. When a body becomes comfortable, it often becomes complacent, and it loses the excitement it once had. It is then no longer attractive to outsiders.
ENGAGEMENT – The body needs all its members. When a few people do all the work burnout is soon to follow. The church shouldn’t depend on paid staff to do all the work, nor should ministry be limited to those with a volunteer title of some sort. If assignments have to be made before people are freed to do the work of the church, over time, the harvest is plenty, but the workers are few.
EFFICIENCY – When programs are so structured that even God couldn’t introduce change, decline is imminent. Growing churches are always thinking how they can improve. The cliche is true, the message never changes, but the hearers do. Finding new ways to reach a changing culture with a Gospel that never changes is part of a growing church’s responsibility.
Obviously there are many other reasons; these are just a few I’ve observed. Whenever I work with a church in decline, I will first look for one of these areas as a solution.
+What have you seen keep a church from growing?
Monday, January 07, 2013
Jack White on Austin City Limits
While I don't own any of his music, it seem every time I hear Jack White play I come away impressed. Below is a link to the PBS Austin City Limits show he did a while back.
I like that the music is pretty straight forward yet creative. And it rocks. Seems like the guy is pretty gifted at what he does, and every time I seem him play it is compelling.
If you're not familiar with his music, I'd suggest starting at the 20 minute mark and watch for about 10 minutes. Good stuff!
Watch Jack White on PBS. See more from Austin City Limits.
I like that the music is pretty straight forward yet creative. And it rocks. Seems like the guy is pretty gifted at what he does, and every time I seem him play it is compelling.
If you're not familiar with his music, I'd suggest starting at the 20 minute mark and watch for about 10 minutes. Good stuff!
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